I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from the Classic 1990 Film: A Look Back.

The Austrian Oak is rightfully celebrated as an iconic tough guy. However, in the midst of his cinematic dominance in the eighties and nineties, he also starred in several surprisingly great comedies. A prime example is Kindergarten Cop, which marks its 35-year mark this December.

The Story and An Iconic Moment

In the hit comedy, Schwarzenegger portrays a tough police officer who goes undercover as a elementary educator to locate a fugitive. For much of the movie, the investigation plot serves as a loose framework for Schwarzenegger to film humorous moments with his young class. The most unforgettable belongs to a child named Joseph, who unprompted stands up and informs the actor, “It's boys who have a penis, girls have a vagina.” Arnold responds dryly, “I appreciate the insight.”

That iconic child was brought to life by child star Miko Hughes. His career encompassed a recurring role on Full House as the bully to the famous sisters and the haunting part of the resurrected boy in the 1989 adaptation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. Hughes remains active today, with a slate of movies on the horizon. He also frequently attends the con circuit. Not long ago shared his experiences from the production over three decades on.

A Young Actor's Perspective

Interviewer: First, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: I think I was four. I was the smallest of all the kids on set.

That's remarkable, I have no memory from being four. Do you retain any flashes from that time?

Yeah, to a degree. They're brief images. They're like picture memories.

Do you recall how you landed the job in Kindergarten Cop?

My parents, primarily my mom would accompany me to auditions. Frequently it was like a cattle call. There'd be a room full of young actors and we'd all just have to wait, go into the room, be in there for a very short time, read a small part they wanted and then leave. My parents would feed me the lines and then, once I learned to read, that was some of the first material I was reading.

Do you have any recollection of meeting Arnold? What was your feeling about him?

He was incredibly nice. He was playful. He was nice, which I guess stands to reason. It would have been odd if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom, that likely wouldn't create a productive set. He was great to work with.

“It would have been odd if he was unpleasant to all the kids in the classroom.”

I knew he was a big action star because my family informed me, but I had never really seen his movies. I knew the air around him — like, that's cool — but he didn't really intimidate me. He was merely entertaining and I was eager to interact with him when he had time. He was working hard, but he'd sometimes engage here and there, and we would hang off of his arms. He'd show his strength and we'd be dangling there. He was really, really generous. He gifted all the students in the classroom a Sony Walkman, which at the time was a major status symbol. This was the hottest tech out there, that distinctive classic yellow cassette player. I used to rock out to the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for a long time on that thing. It wore out in time. I also was given a authentic coach's whistle. He had the coach whistle, and the kids all got a whistle as well.

Do you remember your time filming as being enjoyable?

You know, it's amusing, that movie was this cultural thing. It was a major production, and it was an incredible opportunity, and you would think, as an adult, I would want my memories to be of the star himself, the direction of Ivan Reitman, visiting Astoria, seeing the set, but my memories are of being a finitely child at lunch. For instance, they got everyone pizza, but I avoided pizza. All I would eat was the pepperoni off the top. Then, the original Game Boy was brand new. That was the hot thing, and I was quite skilled. I was the youngest and some of the bigger kids would ask for my help to get past hard parts on games because I could do it, and I was really proud of that. So, it's all childhood recollections.

The Infamous Moment

OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember how it happened? Did you understand the words?

At the time, I wasn't fully aware of what the word taboo meant, but I understood it was edgy and it made adults laugh. I was aware it was kind of something I wouldn't usually utter, but I was given special permission in this case because it was humorous.

“She really wrestled with it.”

How it was conceived, according to family lore, was they were still developing characters. Some character lines were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the entire ensemble assembled, it wasn't pure improvisation, but they worked on it while filming and, presumably the filmmakers came to my mom and said, "We have an idea. We want Miko to have this line. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "Give me a moment, I'll decide tomorrow" and took a day or two. She deliberated carefully. She said she wasn't sure, but she felt it will probably be one of the unforgettable moments from the movie and she was right.